standing with hope

by molly klima

I’m spending more time talking about grief on this blog than I ever planned on. The death I want to talk about today isn’t completely about physical death. Grief is not just when someone we love leaves this world. Grief can show up when your child receives the diagnosis that changes the trajectory for all of your lives. Maybe you have experienced grief in the loss of a job or starting over in a new city. Grief is also when we lose a relationship earth side or lose a physical ability.

On May 11, 2023, one of my best friends, Shauna, had a massive stroke. She spent nearly three weeks in the ICU and five days on life support. Then about another 6 weeks in rehab before she was able to return home.

This past weekend we went on a trip in Northern Michigan with some of our closest friends, Shauna and her family included. We spent the weekend at a ski resort surrounded by deep snow and sunshine despite frigid temps. After an afternoon at a water park, we spent part of the evening on the tubing hill. Boyne Mountain has the best set up. They have a moving sidewalk that takes you to the top of the hill each time you want to come down. I don’t know if they thought about accessibility when they did this or not, but it certainly made this accessible for all of us.

I have to tell you, that watching Shauna being able to enjoy something fun and adventurous again meant a lot. It’s hard to put that into words. Our friend, Alex, had the brilliant idea of pulling Shauna to the moving sidewalk every time she finshed a run down the giant hill. This way she didn’t have to spend as much energy getting on and off the tube and also decreased the risk of falling. After pulling her over to the moving sidewalk, he held onto her tow rope the whole way up and pulled her to the starting lines with Jason, her husband, always right there to catch if her something happened. Over and over.

There was a moment where I looked back at Alex holding her tow rope with Jason making sure she was okay from the back and thought, “This is life after death.”

Obviously, Shauna is still with us and is a walking miracle. That’s not just the best friend in me talking, that’s also coming from her neuro surgeons. But certain things have been lost, even if it’s just temporarily. I live with chronic illness and I can tell you there’s a grief processs that comes along with phsyical or mental limitations.

Life doesn’t have to be the same for it to be okay. Life doesn’t have to be the same to be good or wonderful.

I think we all know that change is inevitable in our lives. None of us are immune from tragedy or unexpected, life altering events. Those who are able to adapt and pivot can sail through winds of change a little more confidently. But when it happens, how do we handle it? Who will help us through it? Where does your hope come from?

I’ve wrote before about having friends who let you down here: Thanks For Letting Me Down.

god is…

It’s tempting in the moment of loss to doubt God’s goodness or His presence with us. It’s easy to believe He has stepped back into the shadows or snuck out the back door. It’s tempting to believe He has abandoned us because it certainly seems at times as if He has. Contrary to our human nature of panic, worry and flailing in the illusion of control, God is:

Steady: “The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22-23

Strong: “God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.” Psalm 46:1

Present: “Yet now He has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, He has brought you into His own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before Him without a single fault.” Colossians 1:22

Compassionate- “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed. The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time.” Psalm 34:18-19

God demonstrated all these things in scripture not only through Himself, but also in human flesh through Jesus. Our human minds struggle to imagine a being that we cannot see who could be so powerful or loving. Our human minds can struggle to beleive God’s presence in the Bible in the form of looming clouds or burning bushes. But Jesus? Well, His existence is hard to deny.

Jesus lived physically present amongst the people. While there’s nothing to suggest that Jesus had a supernatural physical strength, such as Samson, His love and the power of His name was enough to cast out demons and make the blind see again. He is steady in His message. He is compassionate; displaying His grace and love in healing the leper and honoring children, who had no social status at the time.

As much I believe in life after our phsyical deaths, I believe there is life after our losses on earth. Be encouraged, my friends, that as you adjust or pivot or learn to be okay with letting go of something, that God stays the same. He loves you. He sees you. You are not alone. Keep standing, even if your knees are shaking, with hope.

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father
There is no shadow of turning with Thee
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not
As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be

Great is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love

Great is Thy faithfulness
Great is Thy faithfulness
Morning by morning new mercies I see
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow
Blessings all mine with 10, 000 beside

-great is thy faithfulness